More than 15% of Christian men over age sixty admitted to ongoing use. It was more than 20% for men in their fifties, 25% for men in their forties, and 30% for men in their thirties. But nearly 50% of self-professing Christian men, ages 18–29, acknowledged ongoing use of porn. (The survey found a similar trend among women, but in lesser proportions: 10% of females, ages 18–29; 5% in their thirties; increasingly less for forties, fifties, and sixty-plus.)Sexual sin is one of the greatest threats to thriving and vibrant Christian living. Many Christians, especially young singles, are discouraged and defeated in their fight to overcome sexual sin. Many are so overwhelmed they simply give up for a season. They give in to their sin, stop reading their Bibles, stop sharing the gospel, and eventually stop attending corporate worship. Some come back, but many don’t because they can’t imagine a God who is faithful and just and willing to cleanse them of all unrighteousness. Others simply stop believing in God altogether or create a god that approves of their sinful lifestyle. Christians who struggle with sexual sin begin to fear that Christianity has nothing to offer but bad news — guilt and shame. Whether the struggle is with homosexuality, fornication, or pornography, many feel helpless in the fight to kill their sin. They don’t know how to deal with the guilt and shame. They feel unsafe around Christians and struggle to see anything good about the gospel we present, especially when the grace of the gospel is not highlighted or lived out. I recently spoke with Rosaria Butterfield, someone who has thought and written a lot about this subject. She reiterates that the “gospel is good news for sinners and, quite frankly, there is no gospel for people who think they are all cleaned up just the way they are.” If someone thinks he is doing pretty good and doesn’t have a sexual sin issue, she says she is more worried for that person than anybody. The gospel isn’t good news so that we can have a carefree life. “The point of the gospel is to so fully reshape and remake us to reflect the image of our Savior that we are fit to inherit a New Jerusalem with him. And in that New Jerusalem, there is absolutely no category called ‘sexual orientation.’ There are two things that will survive into the New Jerusalem: the souls of people and the word of God.” Rosaria is concerned about how easily personhood is conflated with struggle. The current trend is to define people by their besetting sins. Typically, people who struggle with laziness, gluttony, pride, or sexual immorality define themselves by whatever they struggle with. They often say, “This is just the way I am. I’m just a [fill in the blank] person.” This gives them a false sense of peace, justification, and righteousness. They have peace because they think they’ve accepted themselves for who they truly are. They feel justified and righteous because now the sin is no longer a bad thing, but a personality trait — the way they were born. This pattern of thought is especially dominant among the LGBT movement in regards to sexual orientation. “Sexual orientation is a nineteenth-century invention — very clearly redefining people from souls who will last forever to people whose sexual identities determine who they are, who they really are, their deepest sense of truth and self.”
Peter began to say to him, “See, we have left everything and followed you.” Jesus said, “Truly, I say to you, there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or lands, for my sake and for the gospel, who will not receive a hundredfold now in this time, houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and lands, with persecutions, and in the age to come eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.”“The gospel calls you to lose family and houses and mothers and fathers and farms — your livelihood. But it promises you a hundredfold in this lifetime along with persecutions, and in the days ahead eternal life. I think that verse is tailor-made for people who struggle with an unasked-for homosexual desire, because on the one hand, no one is called to ‘lifelong celibacy.’ That is just an importation from the Catholic Church. So let us not add that yoke to people. But people are called to chastity in singleness and fidelity in marriage. That is what the Bible calls people to.” Rosaria believes that the hundredfold promise to struggling Christians is going to come from the church.
Did you know that almost six out of ten teens leave the church at some point? Nearly 60% of high school students who grow up going to church will close the doors to a Christian life. And usually, they don't come back (survey by the Barna Group). "Because of people breaking the laws and sin being everywhere, the love in the hearts of many people will become cold." Matthew 24:12
Whenever I answer a question like this, I’m deeply aware that someone may be reading this who is seriously contemplating suicide—and I would do everything in my power to convince them not to take that final, drastic step. With Christ, there is always hope. If that’s you, please hear me. Don’t you dare do that! Jesus and I deeply love you and need you.
(This post is written to Christian women and is based on a biblical worldview, supported with Scripture. Since the writing of this post, a sequel has been written, The Motive to Modesty.) Hurriedly I raked through my second dresser drawer in the dim light of the unlit closet, scrambling for pants of some kind. Finding some, I grabbed a workout shirt, jammed feet into tennis shoes and breathlessly answered the door for Mr. M. “Ready for breakfast?” he asked.